As President, it is my great privilege – well, it’s my privilege – actually, let’s just say it’s my job – to grant one clemency today. As I do, I want to take a moment to recognize the brave turkeys who weren’t so lucky, who didn’t get to ride the gravy train to freedom – who met their fate with courage and sacrifice – and proved that they weren’t chicken.  I wish I could pardon them all. Run free young turkey!!

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